Last weekend...I got headbutted by an ex-SBG president, how about that? David S. was talking about rugby and smashing heads. I made the mistake of underestimating how much he had to drink and dared him to butt my head. He was a polite, stately, married man in his 30s, so I didn't think he'd do it. BONK! A friend who was talking with us was like OMG I could hear it. Lucky him. Skulls colliding is truly one of the most precious sounds. I gamely acted as if it didn't affect me that much (it did for a few seconds). Later I asked David if it hurt him. "I don't want to talk about it," He said.

When I was a froshie, at G & G (a dive near campus that served alcohol to the underaged), on a whim I told a guy to take off a cheap looking plague off the wall and drop it to the floor. That he did, without hesitation. The plague was made of plaster and shattered into many pieces. A furious manager stormed to him and told him that thing was worth $500 and he'd call police if he didn't pay for it. When his attention briefly got diverted (by froshies giving him backrubs, what else?), I grabbed the friend and fled the place.

The moral: be careful what you ask for in life, for you might get it. Especially if the recipient of your request is God or a drunk *nodding furiously*